Facing My Fear

I am so glad that I'm almost done with the book I've been reading. It's not at all that I'm bored with it, it's because my time that I am able to blog is spent almost entirely on blogging my answer on the chapter that day. There have been days that, if I hadn't made myself accountable to you and didn't know you were reading my blog, I probably would have put the book back on the shelf and deleted all my posts on the subject. I'm grateful to all of you for not pointing out the fact that I'm behind a day or two. My thinking tells me it might be God's way of showing you how I may be like some of you in ways. I pray that I have been an encouragement to you because I got up and kept going in spite of "falling down". If you've fallen I hope that I can help pick you up and "dust you off" so you can keep going too.

I was reading a blog that a pastor's wife was doing on this same book. She didn't make it as far as I have. However, the day that I found her blog, I'd almost decided that I was just going to tell all of you that I was going to take a break for about a week and then continue. Her last post made me feel that what I had to gain by finishing was too priceless for me to stop now. After all, I'm so close to feeling "at home" spiritually, but not close enough to keep from feeling I could get lost again. If she hadn't gone as far as she could, then I might have given up. It's been very difficult to look at myself, but I'm so thankful that we have such a forgiving and merciful God who really does love us no matter what we've done.

Dear Lord, this is a very difficult time for me, I've put all my trust in You and so many people's trust in You is on the line. Please don't fail me now. The Lord is my shepherd, I shall not want for anything. He maketh me to lie down in green pastures, he leadeth me beside still waters, he restoreth my soul. He guides me in paths of righteousness for His name's sake. Even though I walk in the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil for You are with me, thy rod and thy staff, they comfort me. You prepared a table before me in the presence of mine enemies. You annointed my head with oil and my cup overflows. Surely goodness and mercy will follow me all the days of my life and I will dwell in Your house forever. Don't let my lack of faith be the reason you won't help me in my time of need. Give me the strength I need to overcome my fear of putting all my trust in You. Amen.