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Wednesday, November 09, 2005

We Wrestle Not Against Flesh And Blood, But Against...Spiritual Wickedness In High Places

When I was 15 years old, I had a dream that I was 28 years old and I had two girls. They each had on a t-shirt with a number on it, 8 and 10. After I'd had my second girl, when I was 24, I had the dream again, only this time after I saw my girls, I saw a teenage boy and girl on a rollercoaster. I was at work later that day when I figured out that my girls were going to be 8 and 10 years old when I turned 28, and because people thought I was so young, it was probably me on that rollercoaster.

Honestly, I thought God was telling me that I was going to die on a rollercoaster when I was 28 years old. My 25th birthday was a couple of days later. I went into a deep depression for almost that whole year. Obviously, that didn't happen, but that's about the time that I said, "fine, if you want to be that way then I'm going to" basically take the Bible and summarize it to as simple a form as I could justify to still be somewhat of a Christian. I lived that way almost until I was 28.

It's hard to remember how old I was when I found out what the rollercoaster in my dream meant. Wait a minute, I'm starting to remember. My girls were 6 and 8. It was easier then for me to start enjoying rollercoasters. When I turned 29, I was relieved to be still alive and I started straightening up my act a little. I obeyed the ten commandments to the best of my ability, all the ones I could remember anyway. Thou shalt not steal, lie, cheat, commit adultery, or worship any idols.

When I was 12 and 13, I was "supposed to" have crushes on movie stars and rock stars. All my friends did, but I always was just playing along when I said, "oh yeah, he is sooo fine". I can't remember ever wanting a poster of any of them hanging in my room. When American Idol came out, I figured that the reason was because somewhere in my subconscious I related them to being idols like the ones you're not supposed to worship.

A few years ago, my family was all together for Thanksgiving and I was telling some of the things I remembered from when my brothers and I were little. My older brother adamantly denied it ever happened, almost to the point where I questioned what planet he was living on. This weekend when he was here, he told the same story almost word for word that I had told on Thanksgiving, only from his perspective. My jaw dropped. I looked at my husband and he said, "man, you said that never happened".

My thought then was it was confirmation that I was supposed to be remembering and I still think it is, but I also think that maybe my brother is starting to remember too.

I was sitting here tonight and it occurred to me that I had been shown my future. I did have a life changing event happen, but it wasn't because I was going to die, it was because I was going to marry my husband.

When I met him, I knew that God had sent him to me. I had started going back to church and for the first time in a long time, my life was going pretty good. Before we got married, my husband had told me that he loved me and wanted to grow old with me and I gave him a card. Inside I wrote, "For the first time I know the feeling of being loved and loving someone unconditionally, the way love is supposed to be." About a month ago, I was looking for my daughter's birth certificate and found that he had kept that card in our safe.

Talk about a very humbling feeling coming over me. All that time, I thought I was going to die and I was so mad at God. I realize now, that I was so very, very, very wrong. I've been thinking that maybe He had hardened my heart, but I realize I was the one who hardened my heart because of what I convinced myself that He had in store for me. Because He is a God of grace and mercy, my heart has become unhardened and open to Him.

There was more to my dream and I think I'm beginning to understand it's meaning. After watching a news story on internet predators, it made my stomach turn. How can someone so vile be a leader in one of our churches? I have no doubt that some of those men probably use to sit in church every Sunday morning.

Luk 21:8 And he said, Take heed that ye be not deceived: for many shall come in my name, saying, I am [Christ]; and the time draweth near: go ye not therefore after them.

A whole congregation was deceived by one man, who came in His name. When I was growing up, I remember being told that there is no way that an evil spirit could enter our church because the Spirit in our church was so strong. We have to make our Spirits stronger. If you care about your church, then you need to grow spiritually so that the Spirit can discern between someone who has an evil or a righteous spirit. Don't just leave it up to the people in high places.

The definition of detraction is revealing something about another person that is true but harmful to that person's reputation.

I believe that God will provide that man a remedy if he repents. Jesus has already made atonement for him. Yes, it was a good thing to let the whole world know of this injustice against children, but at the same time, the whole world was told that a "man of God"committed this act. I can't dwell on whether or not God should forgive him, his soul, just like mine has already been bought and paid for. However, I do feel that we are in the middle of a spiritual war and we're going to be on the losing side if we don't start doing what it is prophesied that we should do.

Eph 6:10
Finally, my brethren, be strong in the Lord, and in the power of his might.

Eph 6:11
Put on the whole armour of God, that ye may be able to stand against the wiles of the devil.

Eph 6:12
For we wrestle not against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this world, against spiritual wickedness in high [places].

Eph 6:13
Wherefore take unto you the whole armour of God, that ye may be able to withstand in the evil day, and having done all, to stand.

Eph 6:14
Stand therefore, having your loins girt about with truth, and having on the breastplate of righteousness;

Eph 6:15
And your feet shod with the preparation of the gospel of peace;

Eph 6:16
Above all, taking the shield of faith, wherewith ye shall be able to quench all the fiery darts of the wicked.

Eph 6:17
And take the helmet of salvation, and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God:

Eph 6:18
Praying always with all prayer and supplication in the Spirit, and watching thereunto with all perseverance and supplication for all saints;

Eph 6:19
And for me, that utterance may be given unto me, that I may open my mouth boldly, to make known the mystery of the gospel,

Eph 6:20
For which I am an ambassador in bonds: that therein I may speak boldly, as I ought to speak.


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